I attempted to institute a ‘no-shame’ rule in my work, and it was a lot harder than I expected

When I’m having an unproductive day, I hear the most annoying and unhelpful voices rattling around in my head. It’s usually a variation of taunts about how I should have gotten up earlier or shortened my morning routine. Then it turns into how I better be “on it” for the rest of the day, and tonight I must get an early night’s sleep, because I’m way behind and the only way to get everything done is to be diligent about sticking to my calendar at all costs. I hear how stupid it sounds, and I know it’s not helpful. But for as long as I can remember, a bad day at work always triggers a variation of shame-filled voices. And while I know what I need to do to combat it, I resent how much energy that takes. I’d rather use that energy to get my work done! Last month, I worked on an article where I interviewed women who pursued “cozy entrepreneurship.” For one of the women, that meant following a set of rules and boundaries that optimized her business around her life, rather than the other way around. The first rule was to eliminate shame. That meant not letting harsh voices dictate what she should and shouldn’t do. It seemed an overly simplistic way to tackle a problem that had been buggi…