Cornell Tries Going By Different Name

ITHACA, NY—In an aggressive attempt to distance itself from an alleged sexual assault at one of its fraternity houses, Cornell University hastily announced Thursday that it was now going by a different name. “We determined that the best way forward was a clean start with total rebranding, and in the 90 minutes of its existence, the […] The post Cornell Tries Going By Different Name appeared first on The Onion.

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