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theonion.com · Oct 8

Starbucks Announces New Teen-Free Hours For Nervous Adults Who Just Want To Redeem Birthday Reward

SEATTLE—In an effort to lure back self-conscious adult customers, Starbucks officials announced this week that locations across the country would introduce new teen-free hours for nervous adults who just wanted to redeem their birthday rewards. “Stop by any Starbucks between 8 and 9 a.m. to enjoy your free cake pop without having to worry you’ll […] The post Starbucks Announces New Teen-Free Hours For Nervous Adults Who Just Want To Redeem Birthday Reward appeared first on The Onion.

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